The pope wears green shoes

Hi,

Can you please advise if there is yacht space on vessel, departure from Bremerhaven ....

Thinking ahead before the factory open’s if I need to move yachts to earlier time slot.

Many thanks & regards
...

HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY

oberkörper friii


übersetzt: einz zwei drei, Oberkörper frei!

This fella walks into his local & while ordering himself a pint he notices a guy sitting next to him who he went to school with, so he approaches the guy & asks, "John, Is that you?"
"Oh my god" John replies, "Easy Mark, aint seen you since we left school!"
"Yeah, been a long time" says Mark, "What u been up to?"
"I just finished this course at uni, studying logic" replies John.
"Logic? Whats that all about then?" asks Mark
So John replies "Its kinda difficult to explain but I can give you a little demonstration. Do you have any goldfish?" he asks.
"Yeah" replies Mark
"Ok then. Logic tells me that if you have goldfish, youve either got to have em in a pond in your garden or a tank in your house" John states.
"Yeah i got em in a pond in the back garden"
"OK" he says "then if youve got a pond, logic tells me you might have quite a big garden"
"Yeah its a nice size" he confirms
"Well if you got a big garden, youve probably got a big house too?" he says
"Yeah, I got a new 4 bedroom detatched mate"
"Well if you got a big house with a big garden, you must have a good job? Plenty of dollar comin in?" John asks.
"Yeah Im a doctor"
"Ok - youre a doctor with lots of dough, a big house & a big garden, so you must have a wife & kids by now, huh?" he asks.
"Yeah, Im married with 2 little girls" Mark confirms.
"Ok then, so theres no need to masturbate anymore then is there?"
"Hell no! I aint done that since i was in my teens" he laughs.
"Well there you go" says John, "I worked out that you dont have to bang one out anymore just from asking if you have any goldfish!"
"Woah, thats incredible!" exclaims Mark, & pretty soon he finishes his pint & heads home.
The next day, on his way back from work, Mark pops back into the same pub & sees one of his regular mates sitting at a table, so he goes & sits next to him.
"I saw that John from our science class at school in here yesterday Ben" he tells his friend.
"Oh yeah?" replies Ben, "Whats he been up to?"
"He just finished this university course studying logic" he tells him.
"Logic? Whats that all about then?" asks Ben
"Its hard to explain but I'll give you a little demonstration" Mark says. "Do you have any goldfish at home?" he asks.
Yeah" replies Ben
"Ok then. Logic tells me that if you have goldfish, youve either got to have em in a pond in your garden or a tank in your house"
"Yeah i got em in a pond in the back garden"
"OK" he says "then if youve got a pond, logic tells me you might have quite a big garden"
"Yeah its a nice size" he confirms
"Well if you got a big garden, youve probably got a big house too?" he says
"Well if you got a big house with a big garden, you must have a good job? Plenty of dollar comin in?"
"Yeah, you know I’m a lawyer"
"Ok - youre a lawyer with lots of dough, a big house & a big garden, so you must have a wife & kids?" he asks.
"Yeah, Im married with 2 little boys" Ben replies.
"Ok then, so theres no need to masturbate anymore then is there?"
"Hell no! I aint done that since ages" he laughs.
"Well there you go" says John, "I worked out that you dont have to bang one out anymore just from asking if you have any goldfish!"
"Woah, thats incredible!" exclaims Ben & pretty soon he finishes his pint & heads home.

……So, do you have a goldfish??


Gern gehörte Antwort hierauf:

"Sometimes I don't"

...wenn man einen Kunden namens Mandy hat, sollte man nicht zu viel erwarten:
Folgender Schriftverkehr:
Reeder: "In der Anfrage schrieben Sie "shp" - daher gehen wir davon aus, dass es sich um Breakbulk handelt..."
Mandy: "wir haben uns hier nochmals schlau gemacht und die Ware wird auf jeden Fall selbstfahrend sein und kann ins Schiff gezogen werden"
Reeder: "ist sie nun selbstfahrend oder nur ziehbar?" (naja, eins von beiden sollte es schon sein)
Mandy: "man sagte mir, es handelt sich um einen Ro/Ro-Sendung..."

Tja, was soll man dazu noch sagen?

Das Wasser wird von 14-15:00 Uhr abgestellt - lt. Stadtwerke !!!

--------------------------------------------------

So kam die e-mail an alle. Natürlich wird soetwas nicht unkommentiert gelassen:

Habe zur Sicherheit einen Kaffeevorrat aufgesetzt.

Gibt es bei Euch schon Plünderungen, sind Hamsterkäufe zu verzeichnen?

--------------------------------------------------
und noch einer:

Es stehen 20 x 10 liter eimer im klo.
es kann nichts schiff gehen

Arrghhhh!!!!!!! Was für Hasenhirne....!!!!! --> bunny brains!

Basically, you're too stupid! Beim nächsten mal sollen sie den Scheiß selber machen! Ich habe das nur aus Nettigkeit getan, weil "Christina" mich drum gebeten hatte, da sie keine Zeit hatte.....


..Falls ihr morgen einen festgeklebten Fleck am Straßenrand findet, könnte es sein, dass ich das einmal war..... (dann bin ich schon aus dem Fenster gesprungen)

Mein letzer Wille: Ich wünsche mir, dass alles wieder so wird wie es einmal war!

In loving memory,
citrone

... is like swimming in Syrup

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